CV and BiodataPartner preference: how to word it politely
State the two or three things that truly matter and leave the rest open. A long list of conditions closes doors that a conversation might have opened.
What this section is for
The preference lines tell the other family, briefly, what you are looking for, so that neither side wastes the other's time. They are not a list of demands. Two or three lines are enough. Many good matches differ from what either family first wrote down, so write what is essential and stay open on the rest.
What is worth stating
- Matters that would truly decide it for you: for example willingness to relocate, continuing to work after marriage, living with parents, diet, or openness to a second marriage.
- A broad range, not a specification: "a graduate or above", "27 to 31", "settled in North India".
- Values: honesty, respect for elders, a sense of humour, simplicity.
- Where you are flexible: "city open", "caste no bar", "working or not".
What to leave out
- Physical specifications such as complexion and weight. They hurt people and reflect poorly on the writer.
- Exact salary figures expected of the other person.
- Any mention of gifts, cash or property expected from the other family. Giving or taking dowry is prohibited by law in India under the Dowry Prohibition Act, 1961, and a family that asks is one to avoid.
- Negative lists: "should not be..." repeated five times. Say what you hope for instead.
Fifteen lines to copy and adapt
Looking for an educated, kind and family-minded partner. Profession and city are open.
Prefer a working professional based in or willing to move to Pune. Should value both families equally.
Seeking a well-educated partner with a pleasant nature. A simple wedding is preferred by both families.
Looking for someone honest and respectful, from a cultured family. Vegetarian preferred.
Partner should be a graduate or above, with a steady occupation. Caste no bar.
Seeking a life partner who supports my continuing to work after marriage.
Prefer someone between 27 and 31, settled in North India, with a liking for a quiet family life.
Looking for an understanding partner comfortable with a transferable job.
Seeking a partner willing to settle abroad. Must be ready to work or study there.
Looking for a mature, kind person. Widowed or divorced profiles are welcome.
Prefer a partner from a business family who understands the demands of running a shop.
Seeking a teetotaller and non-smoker with a healthy lifestyle.
Looking for a partner who is comfortable living with my parents.
Seeking someone with a sense of humour, an open mind and respect for elders.
No dowry, given or taken. A simple ceremony with close family is our wish.
Tone
Write as you would speak to a respected stranger. "Seeking", "prefer", "looking for" and "would like" are courteous. "Must", "only" and "strictly" are not, and should be kept for the one condition that really is fixed. Compare "Only doctors need apply" with "Prefer a partner from the medical profession, as our working hours are unusual". The second gives a reason, and a reason invites understanding.
If you have few conditions
Say so. "We are looking for a kind and educated person; other details are open" is a perfectly good preference section, and often draws the most thoughtful replies.
The person's own wishes
The preference should be the wish of the person who is to marry, not only of the elders. Sit together and agree on these lines before the biodata goes out. Then add them in the biodata maker under "Partner preference".
Questions people ask
How many lines should partner preference be?
Two or three. State what is essential and keep the rest open.
Can I mention dowry expectations?
No. Giving or taking dowry is prohibited by law in India. Many families write "no dowry, given or taken".